Shakespearian Insult Kit

Shakespearian Insult Kit

Are you weary of giving voice to the same tired old invectives
when boorish rubes intrude upon your serenity?
Don't you wish you could inveigh your enemy
with a genuinely classic put-down?

Well, now you can.
With this handy-dandy SHAKESPEAREAN INSULT KIT,
you can have the spleen of The Bard at your disposal!

The next time someone cuts you off in traffic,
or a clerk behaves rudely,
stun them with your lexicographical command of vituperation.

Combine one word from each of the three columns below, prefaced with "Thou":

Column 1        Column 2            Column 3

artless             base-court          apple-john
bawdy               bat-fowling         baggage
beslubbering        beef-witted         barnacle
bootless            beetle-headed       bladder
churlish            boil-brained        boar-pig
cockered            clapper-clawed      bugbear
clouted             clay-brained        bum-bailey
craven              common-kissing      canker-blossom
currish             crook-pated         clack-dish
dankish             dismal-dreaming     clotpole
dissembling         dizzy-eyed          coxcomb
droning             doghearted          codpiece
errant              dread-bolted        death-token
fawning             earth-vexing        dewberry
fobbing             elf-skinned         flap-dragon
froward             fat-kidneyed        flax-wench
frothy              fen-sucked          flirt-gill
gleeking            flap-mouthed        foot-licker
goatish             fly-bitten          fustilarian
gorbellied          folly-fallen        giglet
impertinent         fool-born           gudgeon
infectious          full-gorged         haggard
jarring             guts-griping        harpy
loggerheaded        half-faced          hedge-pig
lumpish             hasty-witted        horn-beast
mammering           hedge-born          hugger-mugger
mangled             hell-hated          joithead
mewling             idle-headed         lewdster
paunchy             ill-breeding        lout
pribbling           ill-nurtured        maggot-pie
puking              knotty-pated        malt-worm
puny                milk-livered        mammet
qualling            motley-minded       measle
rank                onion-eyed          minnow
reeky               plume-plucked       miscreant
roguish             pottle-deep         moldwarp
ruttish             pox-marked          mumble-news
saucy               reeling-ripe        nut-hook
spleeny             rough-hewn          pigeon-egg
spongy              rude-growing        pignut
surly               rump-fed            puttock
tottering           shard-borne         pumpion
unmuzzled           sheep-biting        ratsbane
vain                spur-galled         scut
venomed             swag-bellied        skainsmate
villainous          tardy-gaited        strumpet
warped              tickle-brained      varlot
wayward             toad-spotted        vassal
weedy               unchin-snouted      whey-face
yeasty              weather-bitten      wagtail


My additions:

cullionly                whoreson                knave
fusty                     malmsey-nosed         blind-worm
caluminous           rampallian             popinjay
wimpled               lily-livered             scullian
burly-boned         scurvy-valiant       jolt-head
misbegotten         brazen-faced         malcontent
odiferous             unwash'd                devil-monk

poisonous              bunch-back'd        toad
fishified                   leaden-footed       rascal
Wart-necked         muddy-mettled       Basket-Cockle
                              pigeon-liver'd
                             scale-sided

[Thou art] a fusty nut with no kernel!

Taken from: Troilus and Cressida