The late Mitch Hedberg tribute on the Stockpicker blog

Welcome to the first tribute to Mitch Hedberg, my favorite late comedian. If Mitch were here , I think he would give us something like this.
" Welcome to my first late Mitch Hedberg tribute on the Stockpicker blog. We will have fun. I don't know why people call me "late", because I arrived here in heaven "early". There were no escalators or stairs. Hedberg party of one. Sir you have arrived too "early". We are not ready for you yet. Please stand aside over by the fire exit. Wow. I do not want anything to do with fire at this stage in my travels. I will stand over here quietly and have one of these delicious Cinnamon rolls. They are a tasty treat.
"While I wait, I will tell you what happened when I called a stock broker. He told me I should buy something that I can relate to. Well me and my friends after a night of drinking ,drive over to a , Jack in the Box (symbol JACK). We pull in to the drive thru and start talking to the little red post with the person's voice inside of it. Two words that you will need to remember to say, no matter how drunk you are, without laughing. "Bonus Jack". This is the code word. You pull up to the window and the young lady will hand you a big red & white bag. It is delicious because you have the munchies. You have no idea what you are really eating.
Then we will drive over to Micky D's , that's right McDonald's (symbol MCD). Beware of the clown dude there, he is very scary. We will buy mouth watering french fries with salt. The fries box is deceptive. You will be fooled. You see the gold and white stripes on the inside of the fries holder and think you have more fries then are really there. Bummer. You gave away all your fries. You will need to buy more. These companies must have great returns on equity, because twice we have been been duped. Hey wait, we will buy their stock, and get our money back. Thank you for coming to my late Mitch Hedberg tribute on the Stockpicker blog. It was fun to be the guest host. I think I will sit down for a while now, till it is my turn to enter heaven."

Mitch, thank you for coming on the blog. You are the best. Thank you for the great food stock
picks.

Freewilly