What offensive thing did Tommy Hilfiger allegedly say on Oprah?

Search: tommy hilfiger oprah



Why: On reddit, Abercrombie asks 'Jersey Shore' cast not to wear their brand, and in the comments:

oswyn, Yesterday 09:01 PM

Poor A&F is worried about the brand image because the wrong people are wearing it. Some may find this funny because the Jersey shore group seems easy to ridicule. But if A&F said the same thing to another group for example African Americans I think we'd be rightfully appalled. Can anyone remember the backlash against Tommy Hillfiger because of what he allegedly said on Oprah? It should be the same here.

I can not remember that.



Answer: Nothing! Here was a forward that yourmomsilliteratefriend@aol.com sent you in 1996:

Tommy Hilfiger on Oprah



Hello, please read.... and pass on if you haven't already! Everyone needs to see this.



God for Oprah!!!! I'm sure many of you watched the recent taping of The Oprah Winfrey Show where her guest was Tommy Hilfiger. On the show, she asked him if the statements about race he was accused of saying were true. Statements, like"...if I had known African-Americans, Hispanics, Jewish and Asians would buy my clothes, I would not have made them so nice. I wish these people would *NOT* buy my clothes, as they are made for upper class white people."



His answer to Oprah was a simple "YES". Where after she immediately asked him to leave her show. My suggestion? Don't buy your next shirt or Perfume from Tommy Hilfiger. Let's give him what he asked for. Let's not buy His clothes, let's put him in a financial state where he himself will NOT be able to afford the ridiculous prices he puts on his clothes.



BOYCOTT PLEASE...., & SEND THIS MESSAGE TO ANYONE YOU KNOW



Nothing empowers people quite like their own survival!

The rumor stemmed from a fake interview in a Filipino tabloid. Also, Oprah never even met Tommy Hilfiger until 11 years after the alleged kicking-off incident, in May 2007.

She kind of looked like an alien.



Source: Snopes



The More You Know: Anyhoo, CNN says that Abercrombie stock has fallen 9% since they dissed "Jersey Shore," which I guess means they had a lot more orange fistpumping investors than they thought. But I'm not surprised.

What does "Mischief Managed" mean?

Search: mischief managed

Why: On Fuck Yeah Tattoos, during Harry Potter week:

This is my “Mischief Managed” tattoo. Obviously I am a Harry Potter nerd. I wanted something unique (or at least somewhat unique) in a sea of HP geek tattoos.

Etc.

I read all the books and saw all the movies, but I don't remember that. It's been a long time.

Answer: It's how you clear the Marauder's Map!

The map is normally disguised as a blank piece of parchment. To view the map, one must tap it with one's wand and recite, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." The content of the map will reveal itself.

To hide the contents of the map so the parchment appears blank again, one must again tap it and recite, "Mischief managed."

Source: MischiefManaged.com, Wikipedia, Harry Potter Wikia

The More You Know: F, I need to read all these again. I didn't even remember that the Marauders were Remus (Moony), Peter (Wormtail), Sirius (Padfoot), and James (Prongs).

"Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs
Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief-Makers
are proud to present
THE MARAUDER'S MAP"

I didn't even remember that Prongs was a name! Uch, I have a lot of work ahead of me.

What's a lede?

Search: bury the lede

Why: In "We Opened the Relationship, and It Epic-Failed" by MC Housework on xoJane:

I saw no reason to bury the lede with this post.

Answer: It's the "lead" of a story - just an alternate spelling!

Some American English writers use the spelling lede, from the archaic English, to avoid confusion with the printing press type formerly made from the metal lead or the related typographical term leading.

That's "ledding." And then:

Leading refers to the distance between the baselines of successive lines of type. The term originated in the days of hand-typesetting, when thin strips of lead were inserted into the formes to increase the vertical distance between lines of type.

Anyway, to "bury the lede" is to begin a story with details of secondary importance to the reader while postponing more essential points or facts. Boring. Sounds like somebody went to journalism school!

Ostriches don't really bury their heads in the sand. That's an urban legend. But:

If threatened while sitting on the nest, which is simply a cavity scooped in the earth, the hen presses her long neck flat along the ground, blending in with the background.

So where does the myth come from?

Ostriches swallow sand and pebbles to help grind up food in their stomachs. This means they have to bend down and briefly stick their heads in the earth to collect the pebbles. Bingo! Another false myth is born.

More animal myths dispelled here.

Source: Wiktionary, Wikipedia

The More You Know: Speaking of lead ("led"), it has kind of never been actually been used to make pencils. That's another urban legend. The ancient Romans used lead styluses to make light, but legible marks on papyrus. But by the 1500s, people had started wrapping graphite sticks in string because it left darker marks. Wood and graphite pencils came in the 1600s. Behold!

What's the origin of the word "henchman"?

Search: henchman etymology

Why: In the Wikipedia plot summary for True Romance, which I haven't seen in years:

Clarence draws a gun and kills Drexl and a henchman.

What's a hench?

Answer: It comes from the word for "horse"!

• O.N. hesta-maðr, "horse-boy"
• Ger. Hengst, "stallion"
• O.E. hengest, "horse, stallion"
• M.E. henxman, "henchman"
  

Young henchmen, in fact "pages of honour" or squires, rode or walked at the side of their master in processions and the like, and appear in the English royal household from the 14th century until Tudor Queen Elizabeth I abolished the royal henchmen, known also as the "children of honour."

In full color.

But the Pages of Honour still exist. It is usually a distinction granted to teenage sons of members of the nobility and gentry. Their job is to carry the train of the Queen's dress.

Elizabeth II has had about a million of them.

Anyway,

The word [henxman] became obsolete in England, but was retained in Scottish as "personal attendant of a Highland chief," in which sense Sir Walter Scott revived it in literary English from 1810. The sense of "an obedient or unscrupulous follower" is first recorded 1839, probably based on a misunderstanding of the word as used by Scott.

Source: EtymOnline, Wikipedia

The More You Know: Did you miss this news story? I thought his real name was Jimmy Henchman, and I thought, "Boy, is that unfortunate."

Jimmy Henchman Arrested by Feds DEA confirms that Czar Entertainment honcho was apprehended and arraigned on drug charges

The manhunt for hip-hop music executive James "Jimmy Henchman" Rosemond ended Tuesday afternoon (June 21), the DEA confirmed to MTV News. Henchman, who ran the Czar Entertainment management company overseeing the careers of artists like the Game, was arrested in New York City and charged with heading a cocaine trafficking ring.

Rosemond has been on the lam since warrants were issued for his arrest on May 17. On Tuesday afternoon, the onetime music manager noticed federal agents as he walked out of the W Hotel in Union Square, according to the New York Post. Henchman tried to evade US Marshals and DEA agents by taking off on foot, but was apprehended and arrested on 21st Street and Park Avenue South.

Rosemond was then arraigned in Brooklyn on conspiracy to distribute in excess of five kilograms of cocaine; he is being held without bail, a DEA representative told MTV News.

I want to see the Harry Potter crop circles

Search: harry potter crops

Why: On Reddit, "Why are people so stupid?"

Pics plz, durr.

Answer: Oh boy! By an English farmer named Top Pearsy:

Source: Gizmodo

The More You Know: Speaking of series of books I've read that are being made into movies, I'm about 70% through the 3rd "dragon tattoo" book, The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. Since I don't know anyone else who has read all of these (I've only listened to the last 2 on audiobook) and is open for discussion, maybe you have, so here's what's been bothering me:

I hate that we keep rehashing the same events over and over. Some characters have a conversation to plan an activity, and they plan why they're doing it, and then they follow through with the activity, and we see everything. Then, after the activity is over, everyone else has conversations by which they try to interpret the actions and motives of the first characters. Why! I already know what happened. I don't need 200 pages (lol jk, 3 discs) recounting a murder. I love dramatic irony as much as the next kid, but this stuff is booooring. Way to make my 100-minute daily commute even more of a drag, Steig.

Wtf was going on on the 110 South this morning?

Search: 110 traffic chase

Why: We were at a dead stop for a good half hour, and then I saw !3! helicopters hovering over the road way in front in me. I was all, "Where, in Kuwait?!"

Eventually, some policepeople laid down flairs to direct cars to a very crowded exit. The road behind them was free and open for as far as the eye could see:

Answer: High! speed! chase! High! speed! chase!

Los Angeles Police have closed the southbound 110 Freeway after suspects in a high-speed pursuit reportedly tossed rounds of ammunition out of their vehicle Friday morning.

The entire southbound 110 Freeway has been shut down from the 10 Freeway to the 105 Freeway, while police search the area looking for evidence.

Police arrested the three assault suspects after chasing their van to the area of Main Street, just south of the Gardena (91) Freeway in Carson.

I was part of history today!

Source: NBC Los Angeles

The More You Know: Speaking of the 110, I see this one girl almost every night on the way home from work, and then she was driving next to me this morning, too. She's in a creamy colored "new Bug" convertible and has the brightest blonde hair the world has ever seen.

I realize we probably have similar schedules and commutes, but in a city of 15 million people, it's still creepy. If you know this girl, please let her know that she's making me feel like I'm in a David Lynch movie.

I want to see a picture of Ashley Ellerin

Search: ashley ellerin; ashley ellery

Why: The guy who probably killed her in 2001 is being charged with murder in Chicago. Also, she was Ashton Kutcher's girlfriend when she was murdered. I remember reading about that a few years ago, but I forgot about it until now.

Answer: Here she go:

Source:

The More You Know: Ellerin was dead when Kutcher went to pick her up for a post-Grammy Awards party. Here are the grizzly details:

On February 21 in 2001 in 2001, Kutcher had received a call from his new love interest Ellerin. The student, aspiring model and part-time stripper had tried to make a date with the then 23-year-old actor - but Kutcher had fatefully turned down the offer.

He said he would later come to visit her at her Hollywood bungalow - just behind the famous Grauman's Chinese Theatre. Kutcher told police that he later tried to call Ellergin twice during the evening but she had not picked up her phone.

Kutcher drover to her apartment at 10:45pm in the hope of smoothing over what he thought was a looming argument, and he found that the lights were on in her apartment and her car was parked outside. After knocking at the door and calling out to her with no answer, Kutcher said he looked through a window into the apartment and saw what he thought was red wine pooled on the floor.

He thought she was angry at him for not making the earlier date and left. Unbeknown to Kutcher at the time, Ellerin had been stabbed 35 times and was lying dead just beyond his view from the window. The red wine he had seen pooled on the floor was her blood.

Who are America's Most Wanted?

Search: america's most wanted top 10

Why: They caught Whitey Bulger, who I was coincidentally just researching just days ago because I saw this on the Internets:

Topic: I think I found "Whitey" Bulger

The answer was right in front of our faces all along:

(That is Dr. Christian Shephard.)

When we all said we didn't know who Whitey Bulger is (except those of us who researched him in relation to The Departed), Ace was all:

You people didn't know who Whitey Bulger was!?

Whaaaaat?

You don't keep up with America's most wanted? How would you identify criminals!?

I guess that's a good point.

Answer: Well, the good news is that there are only 8 (because 2 of them have been caught!!). The bad news is that the FBI website insists on spelling Osama Bin Laden's name like Usama. What in the.

Here they are. Keep your eyes peeled!

Jason Derek Brown - 5'10, 175 lbs., b. 1969
(has ties in California, Arizona, and Utah; speaks fluent French)

• Wanted for murder and armed robbery in Phoenix, Arizona. During November of 2004, Brown allegedly shot and killed an armored car guard outside a movie theater and then fled with the money.

Robert William Fisher - 6', 190 lbs., b. 1961
(from New York; has ties to Arizona and Florida)

• Wanted for allegedly killing his wife and two young children and then blowing up the house in which they all lived in Scottsdale, Arizona in April of 2001.

Alexis Flores - 5'4, 135 lbs., b. c. 1980
(from / probably around Honduras)

• Wanted for his alleged involvement in the kidnapping and murder of a five-year-old girl in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The girl was reported missing in late July of 2000, and later found strangled to death in a nearby apartment in early August of 2000.

Victor Manuel Gerena - 5'6, 165 lbs., b. 1968
(from NY)

• Wanted in connection with the armed robbery of approximately $7 million from a security company in Connecticut in 1983. He allegedly took two security employees hostage at gunpoint and then handcuffed, bound and injected them with an unknown substance in order to further disable them.

Glen Stewart Godwin - 6', 200 lbs., b. 1958
(probably in Mexico or Central or South America)

• Wanted for his 1987 escape from Folsom State Prison in California, where he was serving a lengthy sentence for murder. Later in 1987, Godwin was arrested for drug trafficking in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. After being convicted, he was sent to a prison in Guadalajara. In April of 1991, Godwin allegedly murdered a fellow inmate and then escaped five months later.

Semion Mogilevich - 5'6, 300 lbs., b. 1946
(probably in Russia, probably Moscow, but also with passports for Israel, Ukraine, and Greece)

• Wanted for his alleged participation in a multi-million dollar scheme to defraud thousands of investors in the stock of a public company incorporated in Canada, but headquartered in Bucks County, Pennsylvania, between 1993 and 1998. e scheme to defraud collapsed in 1998, after thousands of investors lost in excess of 150 million U.S. dollars, and Mogilevich, thought to have allegedly funded and authorized the scheme, was indicted in April of 2003. Womp womp.
  

Eduardo Ravelo - 5'9, 170 lbs., b. 1968
(probably in Mexico or Texas)

• Wanted for his involvement in racketeering activities, conspiracy to launder monetary instruments, and conspiracy to possess heroin, cocaine and marijuana with the intent to distribute. His alleged criminal activities began in 2003.

Joe Luis Saenz - 5'11, 180 lbs., b. 1975
(from LA, probably in Mexico)

• Wanted for murder, rape, and kidnapping. On July 25, 1998, he shot and killed two rival gang members in Los Angeles. Less than two weeks later, on August 5, 1998, Saenz allegedly kidnapped, raped, and murdered his girlfriend. Saenz allegedly murdered a fourth victim in October of 2008 in Los Angeles County.

Source: FBI.gov

The More You Know: But who is Whitey Bulger?

James J. Bulger is being sought for his role in numerous murders committed from the early 1970s through the mid-1980s in connection with his leadership of an organized crime group that allegedly controlled extortion, drug deals, and other illegal activities in the Boston, Massachusetts, area. He has a violent temper and is known to carry a knife at all times.

Bulger is an avid reader with an interest in history. He is known to frequent libraries and historic sites. Bulger may be taking heart medication. He maintains his physical fitness by walking on beaches and in parks with his female companion, Catherine Elizabeth Greig. Bulger and Greig love animals. Bulger has been known to alter his appearance through the use of disguises. He has traveled extensively throughout the United States, Europe, Canada, and Mexico.

Not James Bulger. A different guy. He was the inspiration for Jack Nicholson's character in The Departed. Remember when he threw a fistful of coke at those hookers? That was so weird.

What'a a 5150?

Search: 5150

Why: In Ryan O'Connell's "Top Ten Celebrity Excuses for Acting Completely Bat Shit Insane" on Thought Catalog (I wasn't exaggerating):

Liar: Mischa Barton

Bullshit Meter: 9

Remember when Mischa Barton was placed under a 51/50 and spent two weeks in a mental hospital last year? Now, she’s telling everyone that it all stemmed from having her wisdom teeth removed. She explains, “I’d had enough (of the pain) and I went to the hospital. I am terrified of needles and they wanted to pump me full of drugs and I said, “No, absolutely not. I don’t want to be here,” and got into a fight with the nurses, and that led to my 5150.’ Okay, Mischa. No one’s going to believe that you’re afraid of needles because you look like Amy Winehouse’s wacky cousin. Also, it’s hard to believe that someone could be placed under a 51/50 for simply arguing with a nurse. Liar, Liar, skinny jeans on fire!

Answer: An involuntary psychiatric hold! Police code for "crazy on the loose"!

CALIFORNIA WELFARE AND INSTITUTIONS CODE, SECTION 5150, second paragraph:

"... an application in writing stating the circumstances under which the person's condition was called to the attention of the officer, member of the attending staff, or professional person, and stating that the officer, member of the attending staff, or professional person has probable cause to believe that the person is, as a result of mental disorder, a danger to others, or to himself or herself, or gravely disabled."

Source: Urban Dictionary, Wikipedia

The More You Know: Also the name of the 1986 Van Halen album that featured "Why Can't This Be Love," and also the name of a song on it.

I want to see the leaked set photos for "The Hunger Games"

Search: Fangirltanstic for more The Hunger Games set photos

Why: I finished the 3rd book last night finally. It was... um...

Then I was looking for more casting info, and I saw this:

New set photos from The Hunger Games, Piranha 3DD, and Gravity have leaked online. The Hunger Games photos show some of the buildings like the Hall of Justice, an insignia that fans of the book will probably recognize (I’m reading the book soon! I have a long plane ride ahead of me!), and a first look at Elizabeth Banks as Effie Trinket.

Answer: Inneresting. I think I imagined the Hall of Justice to be a bit more grandiose. And cream-colored. All of them. Which is, I guess, why you read books first. There's also Willow Shields as Prim.

Source: FanGirltastic

The More You Know: Also,

The Piranha 3DD set photos show the water park where the sequel’s mayhem will go down (how does a freshwater fish survive in a chlorinated water park? Fuck you, that’s how) as well as some grisly corpses.

I was in a waterpark just last week! I lost my sunnies, but not my life. Shots:

Oooh! Poor Big Dave.

How did Andy Warhol die?

Search: andy warhol

Why: On Thought Catalog, "5 Celebrities Who Would've Been Perfect for the Internet" by my new favorite writer* Ryan O'Connell:

Andy would’ve ruled supreme on the web. He would’ve beat Kim Kardashian in Twitter followers, and a tweet as simple as “i like oranges” would’ve gotten, like, a thousand retweets. He would love Twitpics. There’d be photos of Viva slumped over in the corner of the Factory in a heroin daze with the caption: “viva goes zzzzz.” His Facebook fan page would have so many “like”s but the comments would be terrible. “Andy is the worst. I wish he would just die!” or “he’s sO UGlY N siCk ewwww. whatAfAG!” When he was shot by Valerie Solanas though, there would’ve been an outpour of digital love. Fans would write, “Hang in there, Andy!” and “Say hi to Edie in heaven for me…” And like the freak that he is, he would’ve tweeted from his hospital bed something like, “someone shot me today and it was brilliant….” Ugh, now that I’m thinking about it, maybe Andy would’ve just had the most annoying internet presence in the world.

*4srs, I've read like 30 of his essays in the last 48 hours.

Answer: From complications after a gall bladder surgery!

Late in his life, Warhol suffered chronic gall bladder problems. His pain intensified in January 1987 during a trip to Italy. On February 20, 1987 he was admitted to New York Hospital. The next morning his gall bladder was successfully removed and Warhol seemed to be recovering well—watching television and talking on the telephone. During that night, however, complications arose which resulted in sudden cardiac arrest. Warhol was pronounced dead at 6:31 am on Sunday, February 22, 1987. He was 58 years old.

That Solanas / shooting thing was just a blip. She was a super radical feminist in the 60s:

In 1966, she wrote a play titled Up Your Ass about a man-hating prostitute and a panhandler. In 1967, she encountered Andy Warhol outside his studio, The Factory, and asked him to produce her play. Intrigued by the title, he accepted the script for review. According to Factory lore, Warhol, whose films were often shut down by the police for obscenity, thought the script was so pornographic that it must be a police trap. He never returned it to Solanas. The script was then lost, not to be found until after Warhol's death, in the bottom of one of his lighting trunks.

Later that year, Solanas began to telephone Warhol, demanding he return the script of Up Your Ass. When Warhol admitted he had lost it, she began demanding money as payment. Warhol ignored these demands but offered her a role in I, a Man. In his book Popism: The Warhol Sixties, Warhol wrote that before she shot him, he thought Solanas was an interesting and funny person, but that her constant demands for attention made her difficult to deal with and ultimately drove him away.

Warhol did give Solanas a role in a scene in his film I, a Man (1968–1969).

On June 3, 1968, she arrived at The Factory and waited for Warhol in the lobby area. When he arrived with friends, she produced a handgun and shot at Warhol 3 times, hitting him once in the chest. She then shot art critic Mario Amaya and also tried to shoot Warhol's manager, Fred Hughes, but her gun jammed as the elevator arrived. Hughes suggested she take it and she did, leaving the Factory. Warhol barely survived; he never fully recovered and for the rest of his life wore a corset to prevent his injuries from worsening.

Later that same day, Solanas turned herself in to a NYPD officer passing by her on the street where she produced the gun and told him about the shooting. She made statements to the arresting officer and at the arraignment hearing that Warhol had "too much control" over her and that Warhol was planning to steal her work. Pleading guilty, she received a three-year sentence in a psychiatric hospital. Warhol refused to testify against her. For the rest of his life, Warhol lived in fear that Solanas would attack him again.

Source: Warhol.org

The More You Know: Andy Warhol's weird white hair was a wig, y'all.

In the mid-1950s Warhol began wearing a hairpiece, which matched his natural dark brown hair color.

In the mid-1960s he supposedly spray-painted his wig silver. Later that decade he adopted the wig that became his permanent look; it was brown in back with shades of blonde on the front and sides.

What is onanism?

Search: onanism

Why: In this story "Man Accused of Masturbating on Flight Faces $5,000 Flight, 90 Days in Jail" on Gothamist (which I went to because Brian's post on The Gate):

Airborne onanism is costly these days! Alleged wanker Kyle Pearce, a 25-year-old Floridian (Go Gators!), was arrested on May 19th after witnesses saw him remove his penis and masturbate "to the point of ejaculation" during a United Airlines flight to Denver. An 18-year-old woman sitting across the aisle from Pearce told police, "I heard a noise and looked over and saw his penis. He was wearing jeans tucked into cowboy boots... He told me his name was Kyle. He ejaculated & got some on the seat." Wow, that Kyle sure knows how to break the ice!

Answer: It's masturbating! Jerking off! J-ing O! And it's Biblical!

• after Onan, son of Judah (Gen. 38:9)
  

But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so whenever he lay with his brother's wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from producing offspring for his brother.

Yuck!

Here's the rest, y'all. It's one of the passages lunatics quote when talking about the Lord's distaste for contraception. Onan's brother was dead, ftr, and Onan only wanted to bang his widow Tamar, not raise her kids:

8 Then Judah said to Onan, 'Go in to your brother's wife and perform the duty of a brother-in-law to her; raise up offspring for your brother.' 9 But since Onan knew that the offspring would not be his, he spilled his semen on the ground whenever he went in to see his brother's wife, so that he would not give offspring to his brother. 10 What he did was displeasing in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death also.

Apparently, the thing that made God mad was that Onan was doing something fun without any consequences. Unacceptable!

Source: Dictionary.com, Matt1618

The More You Know:

What did Thomas Edison due to an elephant?

Search: edison elephant

Why: When Rachel said someone spoiled The Usual Suspects for her, Jeff said:

I hope it wasn't me.

I recently spoiled Edison's Electrocuting an Elephant for the wife.



1903.

Don't tell him, but he just spoiled it for me, too.

Answer: He electrocuted it to death! Oh god...

BUT it turns out this was a very mean elephant who had already trampled to death 3 handlers (one of whom was trying to feed her a lit cigarette) and was scheduled to be euthanized. So it's OK then.

He did it as a demonstration about the dangers of alternating current, which Westinghouse and Tesla were touting. Edison had established direct current at the standard for electricity distribution and was living large off the patent royalties when these guys showed up.

Edison's aggressive campaign to discredit the new current took the macabre form of a series of animal electrocutions using AC (a killing process he referred to snidely as getting "Westinghoused"). Stray dogs and cats were the most easily obtained, but he also zapped a few cattle and horses.

So he found this elephant. A news report:

Topsy, the ill-tempered Coney Island elephant, was put to death in Luna Park, Coney Island, yesterday afternoon. The execution was witnessed by 1,500 or more curious persons, who went down to the island to see the end of the huge beast, to whom they had fed peanuts and cakes in summers that are gone. In order to make Topsy's execution quick and sure 460 grams of cyanide of potassium were fed to her in carrots. Then a hawser was put around her neck and one end attached to a donkey engine and the other to a post. Next wooden sandals lined with copper were attached to her feet. These electrodes were connected by copper wire with the Edison electric light plant and a current of 6,600 volts was sent through her body. The big beast died without a trumpet or a groan.

Yuck!

Is it weird that we have pictures of these guys? Or is it weirder that I don't think I had any idea what Thomas Edison looked like until right now?

Source: Wired.com, Railway Bridge

The More You Know: I was thinking the other day about how funny it is that my cat and dog just walk on and over me as though I'm not even there. I wish we had some giant animals to just walk and climb on all the time without being afraid they would bite me. Baby elephants climb like puppies.

Why did Philippe Croizon have his limbs amputated?

Search: Phillipe Croizon

Why: Edward just posted this article with the tagline, "This guy clearly aspires to get eaten":

Philippe Croizon, Quadruple Amputee, To Brave Shark-Infested Crossings Between Five Continents

Croizon, who made a splash with his English Channel swim in 2010, is going to dive into open seas again, Agence France Presse reported.

A custom pair of flippers enables the limbless Croizon to swim.

With Arnaud Chassery, a former long-distance swimming champion, Croizon will start an aquatic tour in May 2012 in the Pacific Ocean with a 12-mile crossing between coastal towns in Papua New Guinea and Indonesia in an area known to be a shark and poisonous jellyfish habitat.

Etc. Where did his pre-existing limbs go? Into a shark's mouth? Because if so, he's really just an asshole.

Answer: Ha shoot:

• "A freak accident"
• His amputations were required due to a severe electric shock accident which occurred in March 1994.

And if I had scrolled to the bottom of the original article, I might have seen this:

• Croizon lost his arms and legs in 1994 after he was electrocuted while adjusting a television antennae on the roof.

That sucks.

Source: Daily Mail, Wikipedia, AOL

The More You Know: Speaking of sharks, I am going to the beach next week (in Florida, not California). Will I go in the ocean? I can't say for sure yet, but I will keep in mind that bull sharks attack in less than 2 feet of water, and also that they like to kill people in all parts of Florida, including Destin. Other sharks do, too!

Fatal, unprovoked shark attacks in Florida in the last 10 years:

• Thadeus Kubinski, 69 (8/30/2000) - Killed by a bull shark while swimming in Pinellas County, FL. Witnesses said Kubinski had jumped into the water from the dock behind his home for his daily swim and was splashing vigorously. The shark raced toward him with its dorsal fin out of the water. He died from massive blood loss and organ damage before rescuers could get to him. The shark was estimated to be 9 ft long and weigh 400 lbs.
• Eric Reichardt, 42 (9/16/01) - Drowned while diving on the wreck of the Ronald B. Johnson in 270 ft of water 2 miles off Pompano Beach, FL fighting off a bull or tiger shark. His diving regulator may have fallen out of his mouth causing him to drown.
• Jamie Marie Daigle, 14 (6/25/05) - Killed while swimming with a friend on boogie boards about 200 yards off a beach in Walton County, FL, 8 miles east of Destin, FL. Witnesses estimated the shark was 6–8 ft long.
• Stephen Howard Schafer, 38 (2/3/10) - Killed by a bull shark while kitesurfing at approximately 4:15 p.m. about 500 yards off an unguarded section of a beach south of Stuart Beach in Martin County, FL. Authorities initially thought that multiple sharks may have been involved in the incident due to reports by rescuers that he was surrounded by sharks; the Martin County medical examiner's office concluded that he died from massive blood loss from a leg wound

Can you guess how many fatal shark attacks have occurred on dry land? I bet you can.

If you are in California and thinking about joining Saturday Surf Club, don't forget to check the Pacific Coast Shark Watch (for reports about shark sightings this week at Long Beach, Newport, Seal Beach, etc.) every single day until you change your mind. And maybe also think about this poor kid:

• Lucas McKaine Ransom, 19 (10/22/2010) - Died after a great white shark pulled him off his bodyboard just before 9 a.m. about 100 yards off Surf Beach near in Santa Barbara County, CA. He suffered the loss of his left leg, resulting in massive blood loss. The shark that attacked Ransom is believed to have been 17–18 ft long, weighing approximately 4,000 lbs.